Adventures In Dating: Babyfather of the Year

As I journey to be hot in these streets once again after a much needed hiatus, I wish to remind people (and myself) of the of the unfortunate events which occurred in datings past.

I faced the unfortunate pleasure of dealing with these types of men much earlier than I was probably ready to handle, which may have scarred me for life. Though some of these types are good men, to deal with one you need a certain level of maturity to adapt to their situation, which I do not posses.

The man I am referring to is…. Continue reading

#ThrowbackThursday: The Return of BET Uncut

Gather ’round little perverts!

If you were born 1984 or later, then you have probably stayed up late to watch BET Uncut back in the day. Before the internet, and before everything was buckwild and free, BET Uncut was the closest thing you were going to get to porn. Unedited grainy ass music videos were everything around the late 1990’s-early 2000’s and many are very happy to hear that BET Uncut is officially making it’s return.

With how graphic the media is today I don’t know if BET Uncut will have the same taboo impact it had on me during my childhood (these kids today done seen it all), but in honor of BET Uncut making a comeback I will like to present my…

Top Three Throwback “Uncut” Videos Continue reading

Meek Mill and Me

So…I figured that I would hop out the motherfucking Porsche and let the people know what has been going on with me. With the developments involving my fellow Philadelphian, Meek Mill, I feel like I should:

A. Unleash my feelings as well.

B. Show that those from my city aren’t completely petty (just a lil’ bit petty).

If you haven’t been under a rock, then you know that Meek Mill made the unwise decision of starting a Twitter beef with Drake. Drake allegedly had a ghostwriter write a verse on Meek Mill’s track “R.I.C.O” and also most importantly, Drake did not tweet out a link to Meek Mill’s album when it dropped. *crickets*

Since then it has been all downhill for Meek…kind of like my life had been for the last two months.

sad meekInstead of dragging other people into my issues via Twitter, I am choosing to go a better route and just tell y’all why I’m really mad (Meek everyone knows it’s more to this story. Let’s just be honest, let’s just be real). Continue reading

That Moment When You Can’t Fake The Funk

I have been laying in bed for three days straight. I work from home a lot but when I go into the office I sit in my little cubicle fighting back tears. 

I am a self admitted control freak and when I feel like I am losing control this is what happens.

The depressed mood, the withdrawl, and the random thoughts of what if? This is me out of control. 

I understand that things are not meant to be controlled all of the time, and I am familiar with the whole “shit happens” mantra that people love to throw at you when things go wrong (which I’m extremely tired of hearing), but when I cannot control my own body or finances, I am finding this to be a trigger that makes me irrational. 

People treat me like I’m not allowed to feel. I’m sad and it just is. 

I literally cannot move. I can’t get up and go anywhere without feeling embarrassed that people are staring at me and on top of that I am about to lose an insane amount of money. 

I am drained. 

I want to cry but I have no one to cry to. 

I am alone. 

I realize that no one knows me very well and to care how I’m feeling because of the temporary tattoo of a smile and alert eyes I use whenever someone speaks to me. 

People don’t know that a genuine “are you okay?” would really mean a lot right now. 

Even though it’s visibly apparent what’s wrong, I think the issue is that what is wrong with me cannot be fixed with anything but time and even that is not certain. 

I’m in pain. Sometimes it’s a good day, sometimes it’s bad. I am starting to miss the days when all I did was bitch about work. I am tired of this and I don’t know if I will ever be the same again. It’s sad to think that.  

So if you’re wondering why I haven’t been posting as much it’s because I can’t remain in a good mood long enough to make little shady jokes for the masses. 

If you have anything in your arsenal that you think my humor would appreciate please drop the link in the comments. I need to smile. 

Words With Friends: The Return of Paper Brother 

It’s baaaaaaaccccckkkkkk…

In this fine edition of “Words With  Friends” we have to revisit a certain brother from a previous post.

Oh yes, it’s the return of your fave, “The Paper Brother.”

He been gone for a minute,  organizing sit-ins and peaceful protest and shit but he’s back! Back in the form of a simulated conversation between me and my good girlfriends.

Join us as we mock a real life Paper Brother explaining why he’s single.

This may be my favorite *lace sarcasm all up in here* type of man, knowing one in real life makes it all the funnier.

Get into it below…(follow the quotes)   Continue reading